Friday, March 05, 2010

The Wars of the Roses on Facebook, Part 2

Here's the continuation of my previous post. (I did you a favor and jumped over some of the more obscure years.) And be sure to check out the second part of Edward II on Facebook by Kathryn and Rachel and of Henry VIII and Friends on Facebook by Rachel!

Margaret of Anjou, Queen of England and Don’t You Forget It, Either! loves it when men do some serious groveling.

Richard Neville, Earl of Warwick has sore knees.

Richard Neville, Earl of Warwick joined the I Love the House of Lancaster! No, Really! group.

Edward IV, King of England joined the Don’t Think of It as Exile, Think of It as a Holiday! group.

Elizabeth, Queen of England, No Matter What That Frenchwoman Says is going for a nice little rest at Westminster Abbey sanctuary.

Henry VI, King of England wishes someone would explain to him why he has to come out of the Tower and put on the king outfit again.
Richard Neville, Earl of Warwick sent a message to Henry VI: Just sit tight. I’ll explain it all to you when I get there.

Elizabeth, Queen of England, No Matter What That Frenchwoman Says joined the Let’s Name Our Firstborn Son Edward and Bug the Hell out of Future Historical Novelists group.

Edward of Lancaster, Prince of Wales, is really looking forward to chopping off some Yorkist heads.

Edward IV is BACK!!!!!! PARTY!!!!!!

Margaret of Anjou joined the Decorating Your Prison Cell for Less group.
Henry VI left this group.

Anne Neville is thinking of taking some cookery classes to cheer her up in her widowhood.
George, Duke of Clarence likes this.

Richard, Duke of Gloucester thinks it’s high time to get married.
George, Duke of Clarence commented: Maybe there’s a Woodville girl free?
Richard, Duke of Gloucester commented: I was aiming a bit higher, brother dearest.

George, Duke of Clarence joined the Decorating Your Prison Cell for Less group.

George, Duke of Clarence said he’d like to drown his sorrows, but he didn’t mean it lit--

Edward IV has an annoying head cold but should be just fine in a day or so.
Richard, Duke of Gloucester commented: Hope you feel better soon, bro!

Richard, Duke of Gloucester is wondering how he would look in purple.

Edward, Prince of Wales changed his profile to read Edward V, King of England.
Anthony Woodville, Earl Rivers likes this.

Edward V is going to London with Uncle Anthony. Hope to see Uncle Richard and Uncle Harry on the way!
Richard, Duke of Gloucester and Henry Stafford, Duke of Buckingham like this.

Anthony Woodville, Earl Rivers is taking an unexpected trip to Pontefract.

Edward V, King of England would like certain people to remember that he’s the King of England. Not them.
Richard, Duke of York sent a message to Edward V: Uncle Dickon giving you trouble?
Edward V, King of England, replied: He’s a prick. I’ll text you.

Richard, Duke of Gloucester is reading What Color is Your Parachute? A Practical Manual for Job-Hunters and Career-Changers on Goodreads.

William, Lord Hastings is getting ready to go to a boring council meeting. Then supper with Mistress Shore. Sweet!

John Morton, Bishop of Ely hopes everyone likes the nice strawberries he’s grown.

William, Lord Hastings fails to appreciate how wonderful it is to be the first person executed on Tower Green.
Anne Boleyn likes this.

Edward V is really pissed that his Uncle Richard is making him close his Facebook account.
Edward, Earl of Warwick: Bummer, dude. Text me.
Richard, Duke of York: C U Soon, Ned!

Richard, Duke of Gloucester changed his profile to read Richard III, King of England.
Henry Stafford, Duke of Buckingham likes this.

Anne, Queen of England is wondering if she’ll have time to get to the hairdresser for her coronation.
Elizabeth, Queen of England No Matter What that Stupid Dickon Says commented: Just put a bag over your head, dearie. No one will notice.
Anne, Queen of England: Well, I never!
Elizabeth, Queen of England No Matter What that Stupid Dickon Says: Yes, that’s why you only have the one child, dearie.

Henry Stafford, Duke of Buckingham is feeling very important today.

Richard III, King of England is having a great time on his royal progress. They like me! They really, really like me!

Henry Stafford, Duke of Buckingham is feeling confused.
John Morton, Bishop of Ely sent a message to Henry Stafford, Duke of Buckingham: What’s wrong, your grace? Maybe I can help.

Henry Tudor is looking for “England” on Map Quest. Oh, there it is!
Henry Stafford, Duke of Buckingham likes this.
John Morton, Bishop of Ely likes this.
Jasper Tudor likes this.
Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond, likes this.
Elizabeth Woodville, Queen of England No Matter What That Stupid Dickon Says likes this.

Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond, wrote on Henry Tudor’s wall: You are my own sweet son and all my worldly joy. I will be so happy when you arrive in England.
Henry Tudor sent a message to Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond: Er, Mum, next time could you send that to me privately instead of posting it on my wall?
Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond replied: Sorry, my dearest. I haven’t got the hang of the Internet yet. Did you pack a pair of warm slippers for the voyage over?

Henry Stafford, Duke of Buckingham, should have checked The Weather Channel before leaving Wales.
Richard III, King of England commented: God, you’re pathetic, Harry. You know you couldn’t organize an orgy in a brothel, much less a revolt.
John de la Pole, Earl of Lincoln likes this.

Henry Tudor sent a message to Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond: Don’t worry, Mum, I'll get here sooner or later.
Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond: Sigh.

Elizabeth of York is SO looking forward to getting out of sanctuary and staying at Uncle Richard’s court.
Richard III, King of England commented: Be sure to bring that dress I mentioned that time when I visited you and your mother in sanctuary.
Elizabeth of York: But isn’t that the one you said was tight, Uncle?
Richard III, King of England: That’s the one!

Eleanor de Clare, Lady Despenser invited Elizabeth of York to join the My Uncle the King Is One Swell Guy group.
Elizabeth of York accepted the invitation.

Anne, Queen of England joined the It’s Not Consumption, It’s Just a Nagging Cough group.

Richard III, King of England just wishes people would mind their own business for a change. Can’t a lonely widower be friendly to an extremely good-looking, buxom young lady who happens to be his niece without everyone posting on Facebook and Twitter about it?

Elizabeth of York: Stupid Sheriff Hutton. Where’s the sheriff, anyway?

Henry Tudor sent a message to Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond: This time, Mum, I’m coming. I promise.
Margaret Beaufort: Don’t forget your warm cloak.

Richard III, King of England, is headed out to show that Welsh upstart who’s the boss around here, once and for all.
William Stanley and Thomas Stanley like this.
William Stanley and Thomas Stanley unliked this.

You have an invitation from Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond to become a fan of Henry VII, King of England.
Elizabeth of York became a fan of Henry VII, King of England.

Margaret Beaufort, Countess of Richmond started the My Son is King of England, and What Does Your Son Do for a Living? group.

Henry VII, King of England is pleased to announce the birth of his second son, Henry, today.
Catherine of Aragon likes this.
Anne Boleyn likes this.
Jane Seymour likes this.
Anne of Cleves likes this.
Katherine Howard likes this.
Katherine Parr likes this.
Elizabeth I likes this.
The Church of England likes this.
William Shakespeare likes this.
The British tourism industry likes this.
Hollywood likes this.
The English-language publishing industry likes this.

Arthur, Prince of Wales is wondering what all the fuss is about. Stupid baby brother.

18 comments:

Kathryn said...

LOL, love it, especially the My Uncle the King Is One Swell Guy group and the reactions to Henry VIII's birth. :-)

Daphne said...

As usual, too funny!!

CelticLady said...

This would make an awesome book!! *hint*

Robinbird said...

Oh I love it!! I really needed the laugh today!

Mimi said...

Bwahahahahhaha! Perfect.

Sarah said...

Loved it, especially the ending!

Susan Higginbotham said...

Thanks, ladies!

Ceirseach said...

I'm waiting for certain of those ladies to unlike that last event...

Anne Gilbert said...

Wow! I bow to your comic talent! That was absolutely hilarious!

Meghan said...

I just found this and it's fabulous! I literally laughed out loud at least 3 or 4 times. I've got to do one for Ancient Greece!

GlenneG said...

absolutely letter perfect Susan and my stomach hurts from laughing. PLEASE make this a book!

Robinbird said...

Hope to see another installment soon? Hehe. (Glad you liked the cartoon!)

Joansz said...

*ROTFL* Reminds me of 1066 and All That and that's a complement.

Duchess Melissa said...

This is the funniest!! Love it!!

Carla said...

Great stuff, especially the last line.

Muse in the Fog said...

Another hilarious post!!! Thank you :)

Nan Hawthorne, Shield-wall Books said...

Is there no end to your clever ideas and superb delivery?

Raymond of Toulous: I swear! I thought ther rest of them were right behind me!
Emperor Alexius II commented: Toulouse is supposed to be your name, not your goal.

Nan Hawthorne
www.nanhawthorne.com

Blodeuedd said...

Part 2 was great :D